Planting Seeds

Last week I wrote about coaches being teachers — giving players language, making them show us they understand, being intentional about education. This week I want to talk about the part that sometimes gets overlooked: sometimes you teach, and teach, and teach, and it seems like nothing is landing.

And you have to keep going anyway.

It Doesn't Materialize Right Away

Here's something I've had to make peace with: the information we give our players won't always show up immediately. A lot of the time, we're planting seeds — and seeds don't sprout the day you put them in the ground.

I'll be honest about my own frustration here, because I think every coach feels it. There have been plenty of times I've said something to a player over and over, and it genuinely seems like they're not getting it. You start to wonder if you're wasting your breath. If the message is even reaching them. I don’t have any kids yet, but I bet this is how my parents felt about me sometimes.

But more often than not, they're not ignoring it and they're not incapable. They're just in the process. The understanding is forming underneath the surface where you can't see it yet.

Our players are always growing — the same way we are. And growth doesn't run on our timeline. It runs on theirs.

You Don't Always Get to See It

Here's a hard truth. Depending on the environment you're in, you might not even be around to see the seeds you planted sprout.

A kid might move on to another team. Age out of your group. Leave for high school season or college. And the lesson you drilled into them for two years might not click until six months after they've walked out your door — long after you'd know about it.

That's just the nature of this. You plant, and sometimes someone else gets to see the harvest. It's a little corny to say out loud, I know. But it's real, and it's part of our jobs as coaches and educators.

When the Seed Finally Sprouts

What makes me sure this is true is that sometimes, you do get to hear about it.

I've had former players call or text me out of nowhere. "Hey — when you were talking about ____, I finally get what you really meant. I've been using it in ____." Something I said a hundred times, that felt like it bounced off them in the moment, suddenly clicked years later in a situation I wasn't even there for.

Those messages are a gift. Not just because they feel good — though they do. But because they're proof. Proof that the stuff you're saying now, to the kid who seems like they're not listening, might be doing its work quietly, right now, in a way you won't find out about for a long time.

Stay Patient. Stay Consistent.

So here's what I try to remind myself, and what I'll pass to you.

Be patient. Trust that the ideas, the language, the standards are getting through — even when the evidence isn't in front of you yet. Your job isn't to force the seed to sprout on your schedule. Your job is to keep planting, and keep watering, and stay consistent enough that when the moment comes, the lesson is already there waiting.

And remember that every player is different. For some kids, what you're teaching is completely new — it's going to take longer to take root. For others, they've been exposed to something similar before, so they pick it up faster. Neither one is a better or worse player. They're just starting from different places. Meet them where they are and keep planting.

The growth is happening. You just don't always get to watch it in real time.

A Note for the Players

And if you're a player reading this — hear me on this one. Growth is not a straight line. It never has been.

You're going to have weeks where everything clicks and weeks where you feel like you've gone backwards. You'll have games where it all comes together and games where you wonder if you're improving at all. That's not failure. That's exactly what getting better actually looks like. The path has dips, plateaus, and jumps that come out of nowhere, just like the image above shows.

The players who make it aren't the ones who never dip. They're the ones who keep showing up through the flat stretches, trusting that the next jump is coming. Because it is.

That's it for this week. See you next Monday.

— Coach Frim

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